Texas Cheesesteak Massacre: Blogging

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Blogging

So... unimportant.
So... unmotivated.

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Name: McAnerbot

Location: Island Town, British Columbia, Canada

Over educated Under skilled

View my complete profile

I wanted to talk about this with you but whenever we talk there's always something else going on, and I don't feel this way until after I hang up.
I want to see more of you.
Actually, that's not ever it - I want to feel like you want to see more of me.
I feel like I'm on the bottom of your list of priorities, like you do want to spend time with me, but there's always something coming up.
I think the problem is that I feel like if I didn't call you for a week, I wouldn't hear from you for a week.
There's always be an exam, or a talk after school, or a meeting for an organization you're part of, or if not then you'd probably have set the time aside for watching a movie or just being alone and I'd just slip.
And only if I intrude and say "spend some time with me" then you will, but it's forced into your schedule and it can end up that you're checking your watch and can't relax.
I want to sometimes be the priority,
for you to say to yourself "you know what,
I'd like to spend this Friday night with him, and so I'm going to ask if he's available and we'll both make time
for that.
I need to feel like even if we can't spend time together you'd want to spend it with me.
The way I feel now is that you don't have time for me, and that doesn't particularly bother you.
It makes me feel like spending time with me is an imposition you'd rather not have.

I'm not upset that you're busy - we both are, and I'm fine with that -
I'm not upset that we don't get to see each other that often: what bothers me is that I don't feel as needed as I should,
I don't feel like I'm that important to you.
This isn't the end of the world, its just something that's been bothering me for a while and this was the best way to say it, I think.

Anyway,
sorry to ramble like that.
I'll see you soon? This weekend maybe?

P.S: If you ever want to show up at 10:00 pm with a change of clothes and a grin on your face, that would be great.
That would actually be more than great!

I'll end this by saying that you mean a lot to me.
I hope I didn't sound too creepy.
- Whisper Aplogies Color: red
Number: 1.61803399
Element: Earth
Season: Fall
Aspect: Intellect
Race: Caucasian
Weapon: Sword
Animal: Sloth
Character Class: Paladin
Alignment: Lawful-Neutral
Food: Pasta
Drink: Sprite
Comic Character: Batman
Star Wars Guy: Yoda
Star Trek Captain: Picard
Cartoon Character: Soundwave
Video Game Character: Manuel "Manny" Calevera
Movie: The Usual Suspects

Texas Cheesesteak Massacre

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Blogging

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